Archimedes makes it a clean sweep
The senior awards at the annual Magnet Banquet featured the coveted mathematics bust. Jonathan has managed to get it every year, and this year the competition was tighter than ever. He didn’t know right up until he heard his name. We were pleased, first for his achievement (we are proud of you, Boy!) but also because it has turned into such a fun way to torment Christine, and abuse the bust. Each previous bust wears a special hat. There’s a Harry Potter Wizard’s pointy cap, a Dr. Seuss’ Cat in the Hat cap, and the new round of caps, Santa, Varsity, and a Giraffe hat.
And now, we have Archimedes, who transitions from the mathematician, to bishop, to Yellow Jacket. It looks like he picks up a medal or two as well.
I just drank poison
It’s called Cherry Coke Zero.
Look, I used to smoke cigarettes and drink Tab; it’s not like I have an aversion to chemicals. But, really. This is the sickest thing I’ve had in a while. Grosser, even, than Vanilla Coke, and that tasted like sucking on a vanilla candle.
Why can’t Coca-Cola leave well-enough alone? And why does the high school think it’s a good move to remove all the high-calorie Coke products because of health reasons, but leave the foul and poisonous cancer-causing saccharine products?
Riddle me this Batman: What’s in a sexy little bottle disguised with the Coke logo and a silly cartoon cherry? Cherry Dimetapp.
Who thought medicine was a good taste for a soft drink?
Not me.
Coke, you have disappointed me for the last time. I’m drinking water from now on. From the water fountain.